Eurovision Song with accurate subtitles*

*This description may be inaccurate.

This just in...

Man returns home to find his house has been stolen and replaced by chairs. Disgruntled, he goes to find a policeman.

Ironically, immediately after having the chairs removed the victim was attacked by hundreds of circus lions, and found himself defenceless.

From his hospital bed he told reporters 'I did not expect the lions'.